"Lonliness is inner emptiness. Solitude is inner fulfillment" says Foster. He discusses the discipline of Solitude, and how silence can be used to glorify God. Another of his quotes that stood out to me was "Though silence sometimes involves the absence of speech, it always invloves the act of listening." I was moved by the discussion of how we need solitude. Even Jesus (who was extremely popular and important) took times to be 'alone' (from people) and to be with God. I am not sure if I am an introvert or extrovert, but while I love spending time with people, I do need time to be alone, and savor the solitude of being alone.
Sometimes it is difficult for me to determine how to best practice a discpline. However, this time one of Foster's ideas caught my mind like a steal in a Black Friday catalog. This was the practice of a whole day of silence. I thought about it and then determined to do it on the seventeenth of November, a Saturday when I had only homework planned. Two other ideas came to me. One was to spend a half-hour doing a silent prayer walk. The last was being intentional about my small amounts of time throughout the day that were wasted.
Here goes. From sunrise to sunset, I sealed my lips. I went about the day doing my various daily tasks (including homework) in silence. I did slip-up a few times, and accidentally spoke when people came up to talk to me, but I also had an index card that explained my practice to curious people.
How did it go? Once again the strong notion percieved in previous disciplines siezed me, in that just because I am doing this special exercise, it does not mean that I won't have problems. I found myself struggling with sin, and the fact that I was seemingly "trapped" in the limitations of my discipline made me feel helpless. I was helpless to talk with others and helpless to cry out to God.
Second, I realized how much I live and breathe music. So many times I felt like singing, but caught myself. I tried to supplement my urge by listening to music, but it wasn't the same, as I could not sing along.
Finally, I also found a certain kind of joy in the practice. While being speechless felt like a limitation, it also felt like a strength. I avoided wasting words. I realized how few words one needs to function. It is really restful to just listen to others and not yourself.
How well did I listen to God? I did not spend as much time focusing on God as I should have. I feel like I focused more on my schoolwork as a goal, and silence as being an aid to completing that. But as Foster said, it is about listening, not just silence...
I found more silence on my prayer walk a week later. Here I walked into the cold day in a quiet neighborhood in New York. I walked up Sunset Drive as the sun was setting, and beheld gorgeous yellow light descending from behind dark clouds onto the grey hills in the distance. It seemed like the light from an illustrated Bible. I then reflected on Matthew 5:16, and how much we focus on the light that we have to shine on the dark, cold work. But then I reflected on John 1, and how the light that has shone into the darkness is indeed God, and the light that we have is not of us but of God (Jesus). When I feel like I am "running out," my light is not, I merely need to turn to Christ, and find sustenance from Him. He is our light. I also shared with God some prayer requests I had, and found hope, if not answers.
As far as the idea of being intentional about my little bits of time in between my tasks, I didn't really observe that. I think that I work better with big picture goals.
So, where is the big picture? I am working on seeing it. My day of silence was one of frustration, depression, but a little joy. My prayer walk was necessary for me, but I didn't get the answers to prayer that I wanted. I failed to practice the last idea. I can't say that I have changed.
Maybe I am not full, but I am thirsty. I am longing to resist sin and offer God my days. I want to fast from words, as I did on that Saturday. I am longing to find solitude in God in the moments of chaos in my life. I am longing to find fulfillment in Him. I don't feel full, and I am thirsty.
Monday, November 26, 2012
Friday, November 16, 2012
Simplicity
You think that it would simple to practice the discipline of simplicity. Simplicity is the practice of putting the values of our possessions into proportion with them as being gifts from God. As Foster says,"Simplicity is the only thing that sufficiently reorients our lives o that possessions can be genuinely enjoyed with out destroying us. Without simplicity we will either capitulate to the 'mammon' spirit of this present evil age, or we will fall into the un-Christian legalistic asceticism. Both lead to idolatry. Both are spiritually lethal." What we are presented with from God is this balance that has a humble yet confident knowledge of how to receive and share God's good gifts. Foster's understanding of simplicity strongly leans on the Scriptural passage, "But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." (Matthew 6:33 ESV)
I honestly failed to buckle down and practice this discipline throughout the week. Perhaps my life was not simple enough to allow time. I don't have any profound reactions of my experiences, just some reflections of how my life has been from questions prompted by Foster. So, here it goes.
Can I allow an unfavorable comment about myself to stand, without any need to straighten out the matter?
Even when joking with my friends, I feel like I have to justify myself. Whether or not a jesting or serious comment is true, there is something about my pride that has to stutter and and argue to just try to make me not look so stupid. Simplicity?
Do I aim at excellence in my work without regard for what people may say or think?
I am challenged by the words of Collosians, "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men," (Colossians 3:23 ESV). It feels like a difficult balance maintain as I try to work hard and well, but not be upset when my performance is not at the level that I intend. It feels like my excellence is either about me making myself happy or just trying to make my teacher happy.Simplicity?
Foster highlighted ten controlling principles to simplicity. I feel like I have a decent balanced practice of all of them, except for the last one, seeking God's kingdom first. Some days I just don't make time for devotions, and very little time for prayer. I can go about important aspects of my day without coming to my God first in prayer and worship.
I may live simply, but I want to live intentionally. God may have given me a meek spirit that doesn't want to hoard possessions or be covetous or greedy, but I want I want more. I don't want to just be a Christian who is known for what he has not done, but known (at least by God) for what I do do.
I honestly failed to buckle down and practice this discipline throughout the week. Perhaps my life was not simple enough to allow time. I don't have any profound reactions of my experiences, just some reflections of how my life has been from questions prompted by Foster. So, here it goes.
Can I allow an unfavorable comment about myself to stand, without any need to straighten out the matter?
Even when joking with my friends, I feel like I have to justify myself. Whether or not a jesting or serious comment is true, there is something about my pride that has to stutter and and argue to just try to make me not look so stupid. Simplicity?
Do I aim at excellence in my work without regard for what people may say or think?
I am challenged by the words of Collosians, "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men," (Colossians 3:23 ESV). It feels like a difficult balance maintain as I try to work hard and well, but not be upset when my performance is not at the level that I intend. It feels like my excellence is either about me making myself happy or just trying to make my teacher happy.Simplicity?
Foster highlighted ten controlling principles to simplicity. I feel like I have a decent balanced practice of all of them, except for the last one, seeking God's kingdom first. Some days I just don't make time for devotions, and very little time for prayer. I can go about important aspects of my day without coming to my God first in prayer and worship.
I may live simply, but I want to live intentionally. God may have given me a meek spirit that doesn't want to hoard possessions or be covetous or greedy, but I want I want more. I don't want to just be a Christian who is known for what he has not done, but known (at least by God) for what I do do.
Monday, November 12, 2012
Study
This week I practiced the spiritual discipline of study. I was excited about encountering this discipline. I myself love to study Scripture. I learned of four formal steps to study: repetition, concentration, comprehension and reflection. The fifth element of study is not a particular task, but rather a particular mindset, and that is, humility. I felt most convicted by the task of concentration. I love thinking deeply about scripture, but perhaps my greatest downfall is simply staying focused long enough to be productive. Foster delved into some fascinating discussion on taking the principle of study and into our relationships. I was challenged to observe, not judgmentally, but pedagogically my relationships, and my motives for my interactions with others.
Finally, Foster addressed the fact of how we are influenced by the mediums of culture that we absorb and inadvertantly "study." I love his words of a firm wake-up call.
"Now when I speak of mind pollution I am not thinking only of 'bad' books, films and so on, but of mediocre books and films. You see unless we set before ourselves a 'habitual vision of greatness' we will surely degenerate."
I agree with Foster that our culture has set low standards in regard to literature, entertainment, and the other mediums that we study in our lives. I feel like often Christians are not holding themselves to a high enough standard in their consumerism. We should seek the best things, not just mediocre things.
My plan in practicing the discipline was to answer the study questions at the end of the chapter on study to better understand what study means. I also reread the text and the workbook, gaining an analytical understanding of this analytical discipline. I also planned to "study" a portion of my life, that being my relationships.
It took me awhile (like 6 days) to finally dig into a passage and study it. With the suggestion of my teacher, I read 1 Cor. 13. I read it again. And again. I have already read this passage many times in my life, and I just read it, hoping to find something new. I finally focused on verse seventeen. "Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." (1 Corinthians 13:7 ESV)
Here is a bullet-list of my observations:
Now concerning food offered to idols: we know that “all of us possess knowledge.” This “knowledge” puffs up, but love builds up. If anyone imagines that he knows something, he does not yet know as he ought to know. But if anyone loves God, he is known by God.
(1 Corinthians 8:1-3 ESV)
This verse shows knowledge in comparison to love, something our 'love passage' will do. Right after the 'love passage,' love is mentioned in I Cor. 14:1, "Pursue love, and earnestly desire the spiritual gifts, especially that you may prophesy." (1 Corinthians 14:1 ESV)
This merely reaffirms the previous section on how love was greater than the other spiritual gifts. Finally, love is mentioned again at the end of the book, "If anyone has no love for the Lord, let him be accursed. Our Lord, come!" (1 Corinthians 16:22 ESV)
This text helps us understand that our identity is in our love for one another. It is the answer to our dissensions in the church-loving each other. I feel like in a lot of my relationships I have sought to love myself, and not put others first. For me, having love isn't the problem; the problem is how my love is oriented toward myself and not others.
Study brings valuable insight to one's life.
Finally, Foster addressed the fact of how we are influenced by the mediums of culture that we absorb and inadvertantly "study." I love his words of a firm wake-up call.
"Now when I speak of mind pollution I am not thinking only of 'bad' books, films and so on, but of mediocre books and films. You see unless we set before ourselves a 'habitual vision of greatness' we will surely degenerate."
I agree with Foster that our culture has set low standards in regard to literature, entertainment, and the other mediums that we study in our lives. I feel like often Christians are not holding themselves to a high enough standard in their consumerism. We should seek the best things, not just mediocre things.
My plan in practicing the discipline was to answer the study questions at the end of the chapter on study to better understand what study means. I also reread the text and the workbook, gaining an analytical understanding of this analytical discipline. I also planned to "study" a portion of my life, that being my relationships.
It took me awhile (like 6 days) to finally dig into a passage and study it. With the suggestion of my teacher, I read 1 Cor. 13. I read it again. And again. I have already read this passage many times in my life, and I just read it, hoping to find something new. I finally focused on verse seventeen. "Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things." (1 Corinthians 13:7 ESV)
Here is a bullet-list of my observations:
- Why does love sound like a person? Can an idea 'bear' something?
- Is it a word used for God?
- Love is not another spiritual gift, but a quality that EVERYONE needs
- The body of Christ needs different 'body parts'
- perhaps blood is to the body as love is to the church
- The Corinthian Church was facing several problems which Paul addressed
- discussions over Christian preachers
- Issues of Sexual immorality
- marriage, widows, food sacrificed to idols
- worship issues
- spiritual gifts
Now concerning food offered to idols: we know that “all of us possess knowledge.” This “knowledge” puffs up, but love builds up. If anyone imagines that he knows something, he does not yet know as he ought to know. But if anyone loves God, he is known by God.
(1 Corinthians 8:1-3 ESV)
This verse shows knowledge in comparison to love, something our 'love passage' will do. Right after the 'love passage,' love is mentioned in I Cor. 14:1, "Pursue love, and earnestly desire the spiritual gifts, especially that you may prophesy." (1 Corinthians 14:1 ESV)
This merely reaffirms the previous section on how love was greater than the other spiritual gifts. Finally, love is mentioned again at the end of the book, "If anyone has no love for the Lord, let him be accursed. Our Lord, come!" (1 Corinthians 16:22 ESV)
This text helps us understand that our identity is in our love for one another. It is the answer to our dissensions in the church-loving each other. I feel like in a lot of my relationships I have sought to love myself, and not put others first. For me, having love isn't the problem; the problem is how my love is oriented toward myself and not others.
Study brings valuable insight to one's life.
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